Duality

For those of you who actually read my random thoughts, I apologize for the absence. I have been wrestling with something inside. A lot of what I have seen, heard and read lately have a common theme. And God's word has only emphasized this in me. I am struggling with the duality of my life. What I mean is that I am afraid that I am not putting all my eggs into Jesus' basket. There is a world of starving and dying people, there are poor and destitute homeless folks, there are the persecuted for their faith, and I am blessed with so much.

The difference between me and the child that just died in the last 3 seconds from starvation is location. Most of you would say, "Thank God"; and I do. I am extremely thankful for my situation. But I can't help but wonder if all of it is God's blessing or my unwillingness to really serve Him with all I have. Now, I am by no means in a great position. We struggle month to month. But the bottom line is that we have food, shelter, clothing and much more. As I look to Jesus I find myself severely lacking. Jesus himself was technically homeless...by choice. And I don't think that Jesus encourages us to be homeless. As a matter of fact, I think Jesus had a place to sleep most nights. There were generous folks that gave Him what He needed. What is all we have worth anyway? What do we need? Why are we so possessive? What do we want from this life?

Our culture in America is almost shameful. I almost puke when I hear people say that we are God's favorite. Or, that others depravity is a product of their sinfulness. I want you to ask yourself something. If you had two children and one was nicer than the other, would you starve the bad one to death? Of course not. But that is what some people are implying about God. I am privileged to be born in the United States. I have many opportunities that people in other places may not have. But to what end should my privilege be lived out? Should it not be for the glory of God and the sake of serving Him by serving others?

When I read Matthew 5, the Sermon on the Mount, I see Jesus encouraging the not so privileged of the world. "Blessed are the poor in spirit, those who mourn, those who are humble, those who seek justice, those who are merciful, those who have pure hearts, those who are peacemakers, those who are persecuted for doing right." A few of these really hit me hard. To be poor in spirit means that you lack in the spirit. Your soul is struggling. It's not that you are wicked, but that you seek God and all the answers are not there. Your faith has to carry you through and sometimes it is hard. And God's blessing is for the pure of heart, the humble folks who see others as more important than themselves. We say this a lot, but we don't really mean it. Because if we meant it, there would be no homeless and hungry people in the world. And peacemakers? Where are they? We talk about peace but we don't live it. And when was the last time you were persecuted for doing right?

Duality. Do you see what I mean? The difference between really living for God and just making due in a world that sees the divide between the two as acceptable. We don't give our all for God. We give what is left over; after our religious duties to church and family and friends and most of all work. We complain of being tired and worn out because we work so hard to make ends meet and yet the greatest end is not met. Why can't we live simpler and help others to do the same? Why can't we see others that are hurting and pull them alongside?

This is a long thought. I'll have to continue it onto another blog. This is my struggle. But it should be every ones struggle.